I sat with a Jewish man who said to me that he was not sure what value his life had. I asked him to tell me what his Judaism meant to him. And, he told me a story.

I sat with a Wiccan woman who said to me that she wasn’t sure what direction she was supposed to go in her life. I asked her to tell me what her practice of Wicca meant to her. And, she told me a story. 

I sat with a Christian person who said to me that they were exhausted from all that they were doing at church. I asked them to tell me what their Christian faith meant to them. And, they told me a story. 

I sat with an atheist man who said to me that he felt all alone in the world. I asked him to tell me what was important, what he valued in his life. And, he told me a story. 

I suppose by now, you might detect the pattern here. It’s one of the principles on which I base my spiritual direction work: religion is not required. The spiritual life is about meaning; it’s about value; it’s about finding the next step in our lives that brings energy, creativity and joy to our hearts. If one is religious in an intentional, meaningful way, then it will follow that one’s religion is a help in scoping out meaning, value, creativity and joy. And, if one is not religious, my experience is that they can still tell a story about what is meaningful, what is valuable, what brings creativity and joy to their life. 

With or without a religious experience, human beings are inherently meaning-making beings. When we are invited to talk about the meaning we are making with our lives, we almost always do that by telling stories. We each have a repertoire of stories that are ours, that we use to weave meaning in our lives. Sometimes, we find that we have to edit, or change, or add to our stories because–if we are really living–meaning changes for us. And this is where religion might become a bit of an obstacle. Do our religious practices allow us, support us even, when we find that meaning is changing?  Most religions have at least a branch within them that is progressive and flexible. Most religions have a branch that is rigid and inflexible. So, on this matter of religion and spirituality, the real question is, whether we practice a religion or not, what is serving meaning, creativity and joy in our lives? At the end of the day, those experiences will be what we cherish. 

~Robert Patrick